Sports Friday: Eleanor Roosevelt – NFL Halfback?

Eleanor Roosevelt has been many things: First Lady, author, speaker, UN Human Rights Commission chairperson, and National Football League Player?!!??? It happened. Here’s the story.

Dateline October 1946

The war had ended. America now had time to turn its collective attention to raising families, boosting its economy, and a new popular sport known as “football.” Initially a collegiate activity, football was establishing itself on a professional level in the form of the National Football League or the NFL.  Still dwarfed by the popularity of baseball, football owners (then a group more akin to carnival barkers) attempted marketing schemes to drum up interest.  Such gambits included using midgets as balls, assigning a horse as a place kicker for each team, and the ever popular “fan plays for a day.”  This bit of “P.T. Barnum” thinking combined with Eleanor Roosevelt’s love of pigskin would find the former First Lady in the thick of a real football game. From the Canton Repository dated October 28, 1946:

A crowd of ten thousand stood witness to history today as America’s favorite gal, Eleanor Roosevelt, donned shoulder pads to battle as a grid iron gladiator for the hometown Canton Bulldogs.  Initially laughed at by her own teammates in the huddle, Roosevelt silenced the detractors gaining a respectable five yard on the first play as the Bulldog’s halfback. Teammate William “Link” Lyman called Mrs. Roosevelt, “the guttiest lady he’d ever seen,” adding “I’d gladly fight next to her in any foxhole.”  By the game’s end Roosevelt had netted a respectable eighty yards and two touchdowns exhibiting stunning combination of stiff arms, ballet like spins, and bruising power to thwart the Detroit Lion’s defense.  The only black mark on an otherwise sterling day came in the third quarter.  After Mrs. Roosevelt gained a first down, Jimmy Conzelman of the opposing Lions uttered a comment to Mrs. Roosevelt that apparently referenced the reproductive challenges of her late husband, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt.  This comment will go unprinted in this publication.  The usually peaceful woman responded with a knee to the groin resulting in a fifteen yard unnecessary roughness penalty against the Bulldogs. Despite the setback Canton would go on to defeat Detroit 24 – 17.  Perhaps the highest compliment of all came from Canton star and Olympian Jim Thorpe, “All in all I am against woman in sports, but that right there is a football player through and through. We could really use her the rest of the season, but I understand she has more important affairs to attend to.”  When asked by this reporter if a having a female like Mrs. Roosevelt in the locker room was distracting Thorpe responded, “Not at all.  She’s just like one of the guys.”

Although women and men never again intermixed in football, undoubtedly Eleanor Roosevelt paved the way for future trailblazers like golfer Michelle Wie.  Eleanor Roosevelt’s football career ended the same day it began, but her sports endeavors were far from over as her arm wrestling opponents would soon discover – that however is a story for another day.

Eleanor Roosevelt – Football Player.

Strange?  Maybe.  Weird?  Probably.  History?  Definitely!

Black President? Female President? We’ve Already Had Both

Come the democratic primaries millions will choose between Hilary Clinton and Barack Obama: A white woman versus a black man.  If either is elected president it will be a historic first. Or will it? We’ve actually already had a black, female president. True, it was an accident, but it happened!

Dateline March 1849

A hotly contested presidential election saw war hero Zachary Taylor defeat former president (though not incumbent) Martin Van Buren. Taylor, although opposed to slavery in new territories of California and New Mexico, owned several slaves. Known for treating his slaves as kindly as his own sons, Taylor’s “house slave,” Sue May Allcot accompanied Taylor onto the steps of the US Capitol for the Inauguration. The ceremony was a grand affair, but Taylor’s failing health would lead to Allcot holding the Bible while Taylor took the Oath of Office. As Taylor ended the famous words, so did Allcot – she had been repeating Taylor syllable for syllable, a habit she had at the time. Once the oath was finished a grim faced Chief Justice Roger B. Taney informed Taylor that Allcot was now president.  Esoteric rules of procedure dictated that the first to place their hand upon the Bible and say the oath became president.  This was later changed, but for now Allcott was president! Weird and true!!!

The next fourteen days would prove to be some of the strangest in the history of the country.  Allcot enjoyed the office. She met with foreign leaders, appointed a cabinet that many historians still consider among the finest, and decorated the White House with many of the designs it still features today.  She did not as expected try to free the slaves stating, “This appears for the moment to be a states’ rights issue.” Meanwhile Taylor worked feverishly trying to grab back his post. Finally, after a thirty six hour bargaining session a compromise was reached whereas Taylor assumed the presidency and Allcot was appointed as the first ever Secretary of Health and Human Services.

History. It’s a roller coaster ride!!!

Scopes Monkey Trial – Darrow Puts Talking Monkey on the Stand

Dateline – June 1925

In a sweltering courtroom in Dayton, Tennessee. Clarence Darrow and William Jennings Bryan argue what many would consider the trial of the century – The State of Tennessee v. John Thomas Scopes or as it would later be nicknamed “The Scopes Monkey Trial.” You may recall the event as it was portrayed in the film Inherit the Wind. Here is what you may not know:

Clarence Darrow put a talking monkey on the stand. That’s right. A little monkey was sworn in, sat down, and answered Darrow’s questions for a startling half hour.

From the Dayton Herald News dated June 15, 1925:

The drama of the Scopes matter continued to fascinate and stir the wonder of this small hamlet as a thirty pound African green monkey was called to the stand to answer questions from the defense attorney, the esteemed Clarence Darrow.  A shocked crowd proceeded to hoot and holler until reprimanded by Judge John T. Raulston.  Much to the amazement of all, the monkey spoke fluently and eloquently when questioned by Darrow.  However, the greatest surprise of all came when the prosecution’s William Jennings Bryan rose to question the monkey.  Under the harsh pressure of Bryan’s inquisition, the monkey broke down and admitted his answers were coached by Darrow adding, “I don’t believe I am related to any stinkin’ [sic] humans.”  Judge Raulston dismissed the jury saying he, “needed to make sense of all this hurly burly.” The monkey was later seen at a local tavern.  By most eye wittinesses accounts he was visibly intoxicated.

The monkey, named Jefferson, would become something of a notorious character – setting off the pet monkey craze of 1925. Thousands would experience disappointment with their own pet monkeys lacking Jefferson’s speech abilities.  He would also inspire the Cole Porter hit, “The Chatty Monkey Cho Cho.” His battle with the bottle would eventually lead to his demise, when in 1933 Jefferson’s drinking buddy Babe Ruth accidentally sat on him.

Welcome to History in Action!!!

Welcome to history in action. This blog is dedicated to showing that history is as exciting as any shoot ‘em Robocop, Lethal Weapon type movie. History is almost always stranger and weirder than any “Stephan King” fiction. For example did you know:

• Abraham Lincoln never went to college, nor did he know how to read, write, or count without the aid of an abacus!
• Until 1904 the United States Census counted farm cows as part of voting district populations!!
• William Shakespeare was not the author of his famous plays.  Most historians agree they were written by a ten year old Irish child by the name of Ruffus Willmingham!!!
• “Robots” in one form or another have existed for thousands of years.  The Greeks and Romans had crank powered “automons” long before Apple Computer was making its expensive “Ipods”
• “Uncle Sam” was in fact a real man. He fought in many decisive Revolutionary War battles.

These are just some of the topics I’ll be tackling.  History is a lot older than any person (at least living ones!) and a lot stranger. So take a journey with me through a forest of the weird, the amazing, and the beautiful world that is history. T hese aren’t things you’ll find in your average school text book. Stay tuned….to your computer!!!